Today was really good. Went way better than expected. So it’s just typical to come home and have that feeling destroyed. Walk through the front door to a grumpy brother and a sleeping mother. Great, Recipe for success. And then it just got worse.. And now i’m this. I don’t know what this is, but I am it.
I have a surprise maths exam tomorrow. Am I going to be able to do it? probably not, I fully expect to break down… At least they say I can write in pencil as it’s only a mock. I don’t know how much longer I can go on like this, It’s destroying the Nat that you used to know… The better Nat. The slightly happier Nat. The normal Nat?
Suicide is still very prominant in my mind. It just doesn’t want to stop…. I have a plan and everything. :/ I guess it’s the only way to help this though….
6 comments
Gnat just take what you can get…School was good so at least half the day didn’t suck. You never really have gotten along with your family very well but eventually, maybe even next year you can get away from that. Does it matter if you don’t do well on the math exam Gnat, math is a class you don’t even like and is pretty much meaningless in your future goals, so don’t stress on that.
what this guy^ said, math wont necessarily help you in the future, when was in highschool, i hated it, i didn’t had good grades, whenever i tried to study, it was all the same, result, at the end of the school, i had everything done except for math, eventually i asked for help from a friend, he explained everything i needed to know and sucess, this after failing twice, so yea dont stress much about it, i remember going to math classes and playing snake on my calculator, during tests even.
and rethink your suicide, im sure there is something worth to live for, even if not now, just keep searching it till you find it, im sure there is happiness for all of us at the end.
Rethink my suicide? No.. I have to do it. And there is happiness for me At the END? hehe
Travel well my friend Nat
Thank you clarity <3
well Gnat you should just pick a day and plan it out…how about may 22nd 2099 that gives you a bit of time to get all the details lined up properly 🙂