I dont deserve to live. Thats what I think, and thats what I feel everyone else should think about me. Ever since i’ve become a teenager my life has just been shit. You’ll probably say im just overreacting. You’re probably right. But i cant help it. I just hate myself so bad I can barely describe it. Im a failure at life. I had friends, then I lost them, im socially awkward, im a freak, im a coward, im pessimistic, im selfish, im useless, im dumb, im slow and im narrow-minded. I feel like Gods mistake. Aparrently God gave everyone a good trait, but not me. Like I said, im a mistake, a freak. I almost wish that I could be in a really difficult situation with my family life, that way i have an excuse to be depressed, but no, i have to just be living a sheltered life while being a overreactive, sensitive whiny teenager. When I think about myself in the future, the only thing i can think about is me living off social security, being ugly and having no friends. I wish someone could just kill me that way I could just be free of myself, because I dont deserve to have a great life but to be a dumb freak who just wastes space, time and energy. :'(
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
3 comments
Everyone is given the chance to live, everyone deserves to have that chance which you were given.
How old would you be? If you don’t mind one asking.
Also, ’tis not wise to compare your situations to others. No one here judges you upon what you experience and the cause, whatever it may be, for that.
You are a person. You are yourself. You’re not dumb or ugly, you are you and from your words, I believe you are beautiful.
The future does not exsist either. ‘Tis not real for we have not lived it nor seen it or can be of it. The future is now, whatever you make it to be, whatever you heart desires it to become.
Talk to me whenever you feel the desire to speak.
emilyspoetry@hotmail.com
I think its impossible for teens not to compare themselves to others, they are surrounded by ‘others’ and they have nothing known of themselves to praise, mostly.
Hugoka, you don’t know your talents until you are tested at them.
You’re not being offered challenges so you have no clue what you can or can’t achieve.
Right now you are depressed, your goal should be recovery. Not classes, fashion, popularity, collecting all the pokemon or other crap in kids lives.
Ask someone for help, believe me people want to help, it validates their lives.
Seeing a professional is a big relief, nice sterile clinical discussion of how you feel, takes all the heavy emotion and mystery off the top, makes it textbook, treatable.
Stay strong, you can do this.