My mother is terrible to me and I have no social life where I am. I am basically raising my younger sister and my mom doesn’t give two shits about me. I want to die, but I don’t want my sister to have post tramatic stress disorder. I want to die so bad. I hate everything. It has come to the point where sometime I haven’t eaten for weeks at a time. I need death. I would indulge myself with death before someone could care.
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Damn, you have it bad. I’m sorry your mother is a beast. I am not an altruistic person myself so what I’m going to tell you is a bit hypocritical: You have to stay for your sister. I think if you dig deep and are very honest with yourself you might find that your sister isn’t the only reason you are still living. Some part of you must not want to die or is afraid of that final destination. If you have really come to terms with death then you can always take that option later. If death doesn’t scare you then you should be able to move through life the knowledge that you can always end it. Or maybe I am just an ass that doesn’t know what he’s talking about. It wouldn’t the first time I’ve read someone wrong.