Imagine the peace

Hello, I am a 16 heats old boy from norway. I have during the past year been wondering on wether or not my life is worth living. I have all my life been interested and engaged in looks and beauty stuff (I am 100% straight). i just care how i look. lately, the last year i have been bothered with my looks. i wont go into specifics because that is not relevant. I simply cant imagine myself living a life as the person I am. when i look around i can hardly find anyone id rather not be. im not extremely ugly, many or some might find me attractive and i am not lonely. Im not a virgin and i have many friends. my looks only bother ME, but its bothering me alot. some days i experience breakdowns (often when i think of what my future will bring). i dont want to have children because i wont risk that they fall into the same path i have. When i think about how mentally stable all my friends and family look at me as(perfectly fine) i just cant imagine raising a child wondering if he is planning to kill himself.

then i think of what taking my life means. I realise that i really dont want to live anymore, i simply dont want to live a life as myself. killing myself would bring eternal peace for me and my soul. i honestly dont know why i am posting this, but i guess i want someone to know what i feel, i dont know..