I’m sick of all the looks and the secrets and the disapproval , I want a friend who knows me and can accept me, but no, there’s only stupid judgemental people, he’s fat he must eat like a pig, he corrected me he must think he’s fucking better than me.
I can’t do anything right, I try to help my brother and sister patch things up, end up getting him estranged entirely, I wish I was older so I could just leave and start again. Not that I could actually do that, I’d lose my anchors and then I’d end it.
Which may not be a bad thing. I wish I could show people how I think so they wouldn’t be so afraid of me, I don’t know what I did to make them hate me so. I wish I wasn’t so damn WRONG, or so fucking angry. I want this cloying sorrow to leave me, if only for a little while, just let me sleep. I wish there was someone who cared about me, I’m so lonely.
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6 comments
This will sound crazy, cause you don’t know me, but you’re not alone! And you can’t leave your brother and sister. They love you. And you don’t need friends, you have them, that’s all you need. If you want someone to talk to, maybe them? Or, hey, talk to me. Yesh I know I’m a complete stranger but just levying you know, you’re not alone, we’re all going through something. But people can help.
You evidently have a better family than I, don’t lose them.
I am sorry for your pain…I rush I could write some prophetic emotional insight here but I am too dead inside myself. Things stink everywhere. As I look around I just see a bunch of people just trying to get by….not living – just existing. It makes me so sad.
I don’t have a family.
I’m sorry, I’m a complete arse. I just meant my family isn’t like that.
It’s ok, don’t apologize. It’s fine.