well my life sucks .. ive drinken ALOT of pills but it never seems to kill me not even do anything to me .. i have to much problems & surpisingly i am only 14 .. i have pressure at school at home everywere i ust want to die & get it over with .. how can i kill my self ?
December 2012
Hello, I am a 16 heats old boy from norway. I have during the past year been wondering on wether or not my life is worth living. I have all my life been interested and engaged in looks and beauty stuff (I am 100% straight). i just care how i look. lately, the last year i have been bothered with my looks. i wont go into specifics because that is not relevant. I simply cant imagine myself living a life as the person I am. when i look around i can hardly find anyone id rather not be. im not extremely ugly, many or some might find […]
I am so done with being here my life is in a constant state of a downward spiral. I’m alone and I can’t take it anymore. Love will never be in my reach I am unlovable and my heart seeks what it shall never have
6 or 7 Melatonin should help me fall asleep tonight.. maybe a few more..
(Not trying to kill myself)
I’m not coming back to log in anymore… I’m done reading about pain and ridiculous ways to die that iv’e already ruled out… I this to be painless… and comforting… coming back here is making everything worse… bye.
Death right now, just seems to make things easier. If i just died tonight then NO MORE anything. (obviously) Just seriosuly wish i could die so that i didnt have to deal with anyyyyythinggggggggg.
Today, i cut for the first time. The funny thing is, there wasnt a big traumatic event to trigger it. I just felt really stressed out and helpless so i decided to cut. I dont know how i feel about it. All i know is that it felt good afterwards, like a weight was lifted up from my shoulders. I know its bad to cut but i guess i felt like there was no other options for me.
i really dont know where to start. ive been depressed again for last 2 days and counting …
ive been listening the same song since this morning until now (1.30AM)
dislike most of the ppl here i dont have family issues or break ups. i love my family and they love me. there is this thing that no one can really understand it. i know its kinda useless to say that but “I am Iranian”.
i hate almost everything. i start my day by saying fu** words every day. im pretty sure i have no future. maybe thats what bothers me the most. i hate my culture , […]
Hey, I am Kriss (Short for Kristina). I am 15, going on 16, and I live in Ohio. I am German, and British with a little bit of Native American and Irish in me.
I just thought I would be neighborly and introduce myself. I am here because, like most everyone, I at one time have tried to kill myself. I was only 11 the first time, 13 and then 15. I have always had PSTD. For those who don’t know that is Post Tramatic Stress Disorder. What happened, though, that would have caused me this terrible thing? Well, here is my story.
I went to […]
I have no real reason to kill myself. I guess I’m being really selfish and unreasonable. My boyfriend left me oh..about month and a half ago. I really loved him..no..I was obsessed with him. I still am. After he left me I threatened to kill myself and his mother found out. He still really cares about me, he only left in the first place because he thought I could do better. It really destroyed me inside. I’ve done awful things. I’ve cut, I’ve lied, I’ve threatened to kill myself, I’ve tried to blackmail him and I’ve used other people. I feel worthless, unattractive, unable to […]
I woke up very anxious and stressed this morning. It’s midnight here now. And I’m thinking of suicide again. And murder. My parents’ arguing woke me up. It always bothers me when they fight. Why? Because I have a crazy mother. Yes, crazy. Clinically diagnosed with bipolar disorder or manic-depressive illness. I have seen her at a low level to the highest peak of her craziness. And when she gets nuts, really nuts, I shake like hell. I hate how much I am unable to control it. I always tell myself to toughen up but my body and mind defies me. I put […]
I often find myself wondering why I’m here. Why do I exist if no one really seems to want me around. I find myself crying myself to sleep and hoping I don’t wake up. I always feel that everyone would be much better off without me anyhow. Less arguing, more money for my family, shit. I bet they would be happier too, since I am the reason that they argue as often as they do. I need a reason to be here.. Because I’ve run out of them.
My whole life I’ve always thought of  myself to be this “good girl”. Like success was the only option and I was so confident that I’d get the whole “storybook” lifestyle. And I’m not someone who believes things are handed to you so I knew there would be some hardships but I just don’t think anyone should go through such constant disappointments. I think I’ve reached my limit, I’ve completely lost myself. Nothing I do makes any sense to me But I just can’t stop it. I just want to be happy, but I never can. I’ve always been a good student but I’m flunking […]
It’ll get better you just gotta wait! I’ve been waiting for years and nothing has changed. And you still say have hope, well has that helped? Nope.
never has, never will and yet you keep saying it still.
“Don’t give up J, it will”
It will in a pill, it will in a rope. Stop saying have hope i’d rather slit my throught, there’s no better way to go than fast and quiet, though iv’e never had the guts to even try it.
Someday i’ll be too weak,
someday i’ll stop fighting. that day will be very exciting. energy would surge through me llike lightning. […]
I don’t post so often. I know no one is interested in reading this shit but it feels okay writing.
I’m gonna overdose on new year I will probably not be dead but it’s okay for me when i’m poisoned so this shit body can suffer. It would be even more amazing if i would go into coma. Would love that.
Anyway that’s it. Love you all.
So as it turns out one of my closest friends is gay. He came out about 4 days ago and we were all shocked because he has had more GF’s than me in the past. We didn’t really know what to say, we couldn’t really say much since he just text us this.
We all met up the other night and it was the first real test to see if things were going to be different just because he was gay.  I like to think we are an open minded bunch, and I also liked to think that I am not prejudiced against anyone for any reason. But you never really know if your comfortable […]
I went for a walk tonight and it occurred to me that maybe there are just too many people in the world. Maybe somehow the universe just created too many people and some of us are just not needed. Perhaps I am one of the people that isn’t really meant to be here. I really am unwanted. I have no friends. Yes, I have people that I talk to at work, but no real friends. I am 37, I work in a professional job. I don’t have kids. I have been in a relationship with a man for the past 7 years (we don’t live […]
Whatever it might cost, a look into the future,
Forsaken but not lost,
Nor given in to torture,
Like noises in the wall, no one will notice,
You know you will fall
And drown in misfortune.
Crowned by the doom, you almost see it coming,
To stand or to give up,
You can figure nothing.
Then you retrace your steps, and when the world rejoices
You stumble back and forth,
You’re torn between the choices…
And the disaster gleams, beckoning the reverie
You’re dwelling into dreams
You know astral travelling,
Far away from scorns and senseless agitations
You’re breaking into thorns
Of […]
i was so sad so angry and i dont know why but its gone now and i am my own master my depression is gone i cant put it into words life is so perfectly imperfect
and i sit back and laugh for no reason i am so FUCKING HAAAAPPY!!!!!!!!!!! push through it if i can get past cultists and having no place to live you can do it too we are all in this together just think what would happen if you started acting that out others would stare at first but eventualy you find yourself and you help everyone else just by being […]