Deep thoughts….

I think about suicide every single day. But then I remember upcoming appointments and functions that family members want to take me to. Then I think of a few family members and friends who I adore, and who love me. For that I’m still alive today. I really hope there’s someone in your life who is caring enough to you that you value enough to stay alive for. I know it’s probably a silly way of thinking, but it works for me. Just one friend, one family member, one pet or one whatever valuable thing to hold onto, for me is enough to keep me here otherwise I’d be missing out on happiness from that valuable thing or person if I’d successfully committed suicide.

Makes me glad the doctor stopped me from drinking a two litre bottle of coke through my grandparents… I still want to abuse coke and other soft drink but I’m finding it too hard to want to because of other help my doctor wants to give me, and some other nice things that’ll be happening this year. I’m definitely putting suicide on hold just for now.