I hate myself. I hate everything. I just had a large argument with my dad and my brother and i just hate myself. The only good trait i have is also and almost always bad. I try to be compassionate, and i am with some people and im a dick with others. I just hate how useless i am and how i have no good traits, im such a changeable, weird bipolar disorder like guy. I just hate it. I want out of life. My dad was angry at me because i have a dream of moving to london (and i hate perth) yet they are angry at me because i have never experienced london life, but i just feel such a strong pull towards it, like a magnet. I just feel like their’s no good left in me and im just a strange toy that changes its voice message every tme you press the button. I just want to shrivel up and die.
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Let me write what I just read. You hate yourself because you want to move to London and your parents don’t think it’s a good idea? Have you been treated for bipolar? If not, perhaps get some treatment. Your parents are probably thinking your decision is not realistic. From your writing, it sounds as if you are very angry at your state of mind, not at the real you, the more stable you that you could be with medication.
Good luck with it all. It sounds like your parents at least care, even if they don’t show it in a gentle way.
I dont hate myself because i want to live in london, thats what my parents are angry at me over seeing as i havent been there, im more angry at…. nevermind its very complicated
and no i havent been treated, but i seem to have all the symptoms