Well I’m not sure where to start with this post . . .
I feel rather blank for a while. I’m hardly doing any of my school work and have been failing for a while, that’s probably the worst. I’m a bit uncertain of my social situation you see I really only have two friends who I still hang out with sort of often, but for a while now their interest in video games have dissipated, something im still very into. I still have fun with them but as they get more social and, despite their encouragement, really have lost interest in hanging out with them. At this point I only see them when they call me but, I sometimes decline still . . .
Well more on the depression point I have been diagnosed as depressed and something like mild bipolor. I have been taking meds and seeing a therapist. Meds help anxiety and the therapy makes me feel better after going but I feel it doesn’t really help me past that. I do cut, not my wrists but my shoulder obviously because I don’t like the scars being easily seen. It calms me a bit when stressed and otherwise it just feels good, I don’t know exactly why I think it has do with the body releasing some chemical. Of course I have had plenty of suicidal thoughts . . . I don’t think I would kill myself, the research of seeing if there’s a painless solution really dissuades me.
So in conclusion I’m don’t see where my life is going and have a serious lack of motivation. On side notes I’m a senior in high school, was diagnosed with Aspergers REALLY early and have plenty of family issues that would take too long write out well right now . . . I even am unsure of my reason for posting really.
Sorry this seemed a bit scatter shot my thought are like that right now.