Within the bounds of horror

A week of coincidences. Those unhappy bitches just never let up. Every time I take a step aside, there they emerge, out of nowhere. Every time I do particular things, either intentionally or unintentionally, no matter what the outcome is. Much like someone trying to tell me:  Stick to the same route, or you know you’ll regret it. It STILL has me wondering, who is behind the wheel of my life? I only know it ain’t me.

I’ve been sleeping badly this past week. I don’t even know if I’ve been sleeping at all. It could be that drinking 10 cups of coffee in a day until the point of disgust is taking its toll. Because other than tossing & turning it feels more like hovering somewhere on the verge of sleep and wakefulness.

Did I already mention I have nightmares? I think I did. The weirdest and most disturbing of them I call the harkies. Sometimes these nightly tortures make me think my dreams don’t always belong to me. Like I’m being forced into them. Damn, now I’ve come to believe they might have something to do with the supernatural. Because even my sick distorted mind is just not capable of creating and maintaining such unworldly pictures that way too often have nothing to do with my real life.  And I find myself so easily frightened by things that go bump in the night… (LOL’s)

I just can’t find a better explanation for what is going on with me. All this bad luck, unhappy coincidences, thinking that I’ve been cursed since the moment I was born… I know it’d be ridiculous to blame everything bad that happens to me on some sort of paranormal intervention, but I can’t rule out the possibility of some unknown force  continuously destroying me. Or it could be that in all this chaos  I simply lost any ability to reasonably assess things and have gone absolutely crazy. That’s all there is to it.