Hello!
I really want to discuss the Pros and Cons of using anti depressants. I have come to the stage in my life where I have had major depression for at least 6 years.
At the moment, it’s all catching up to me. I don’t want to feel anything, I want to be numb. Â Please reply to this if you have ANY advice at all. I really don’t know what to do, and if you want more information about me feel free to ask.
Thank you.
15 comments
I think that the “pro” is, that the right antidepressant could (just about) fix everything that’s wrong with people’s moods. I know several people who have told me this. They have disappointments and bad days too, but what they told me is that their med’s really help them. Now, each person that told me this had to try multiple different med’s (for a month or two each med tried) some said they tried dozens of med’s and it took them multiple years to find a med that is effective for them.
To me, that is the main drawback. There are side effects like I don’t care about sex. But I don’t have a woman so that don’t matter. I’ve tried 5 med’s over the past 12 months but none worked for me yet. I’ll probably kill myself next weekend, but I don’t regret trying to find the right medication for myself.
The trouble is, that different people make enzymes that might “block” a med, or metabolize a med in minutes s.t. the med is “burned up” as quickly as our stomachs absorb them. One doctor told me that in the near future, there will be a quick blood and urine test to foretell which med’s will work in any given patient. Best of luck to you my friend.
Hello! Have you ever been on anything? Maybe you didn’t feel it worked for you? I know it can be trial-and-error to find the right ones and the right dosage. Not sure how much advice I have but I’ll share my experience with them.
I was on (generic forms of) Zoloft then Prozac for about 6 years. I’d been feeling suicidal at the time and I went to the doc to get something to make me not feel. Was told I should go to therapy as well, but I blew that off, because there was really nothing ~wrong~ with me in a way that I felt therapy could fix… I was just a fuck-up. The drugs worked okay I guess… I had some issues with one side effect (no sex drive) that the doctor said WASN’T a side effect but the internet said he’s full of crap… maybe they weren’t the right ones for me… I had no major depressive episodes in all that time though, and no suicidal thoughts. Then I thought, hell, I don’t need this anymore, I’m not depressed, I don’t want to spend the rest of my life taking drugs I don’t need. I weaned myself off without even talking to my psychiatrist. His office never even called me when I stopped going.
A few months later I had sort of a mini depression. It was horrible for a few weeks, but I got out of the funk completely in another couple months or so. I thought “well, that’s life, ups and downs.” It was another 2 years before this last major one, that’s lasted almost 9 months now. This time, with a lot of encouragement, I tried therapy instead of meds. I liked therapy but after being depressed for 4 months the suicidal thoughts started. My therapist kept urging me to try medication. You would think that after feeling a lot of pain, I would WANT to get rid of it and feel nothing, but I was protective of it. I didn’t want some drug changing the way I think, “talking me out of” my suicide plans, essentially. But she convinced me to at least give it a try.
So she referred me to a psychiatrist who started me on (generic) Wellbutrin. This is very different from the others I was on. It’s a stimulant. Honestly, I’m not sure how much it’s really helping me, but I like being on it 🙂 I do think it’s controlling my negative thoughts, which used to run rampant through my brain. Now, if I stop and try to focus on them… sometimes they’re not even there at all. That little voice that tells me I’m worthless and stupid and a waste of space is asleep, I guess. It’s weird. I should be happy about this, but I’m not really. I’m not numb, though. I still feel intense pain. (wish there was intense joy to offset that!) It’s just more…. compartmentalized, I guess.
It can take a while for some of them to start working so you have to stick with it a little while at first. Everyone’s body chemistry is different so what works for one person may not work for you. And I highly recommend therapy, if you can find a therapist you feel comfortable with. Drugs alone don’t solve everything.
I hope some of my babble was helpful to you. Good luck!
Hello, I too suffer from depression. I’ve been off and on meds for about eight years now. What I have found is that when I DO take antidepressants, I don’t feel much of anything. I feel numb. And although that may sound like a good thing, it isn’t. It drives me crazy. I started to self-harm because of this feeling. I was tired of feeling numb. I cut just so I could feel SOMETHING, even if that somethiing was pain.
Anywho, my advice to you is that antidepressants are different for everyone. Try them for six weeks. If you don’t like them, no harm no foul.
@coitus Dude, try to get on Wellbutrin. It actually stimulates the sex drive.
I don’t need that either since I don’t have a man, it’s wasted on me. I have a naturally low sex drive anyway so there’s really not much difference.
I was on wellbutrin and I had a seizure. Never again. D:
Just me personally, I would try everything else possible first before resorting to the use of a pharmaceutical drug. So many other things affect mood. Is your diet clean? There are all sorts of foods known to be bad for us an our mood. Look into eating more fresh raw foods. Do you exercise? There are studies that literally say physical activity shows as much improvement in mood as some of the name brand anti-depressant drugs. How is your social life? We become sad when we don’t interact with other people. Are you happy in your personal life, etc.
Society treats depression as if we just need to eliminate it as quickly as possible, but depression can also exist for a reason as a tool to help us figure something out. Medicating the pain away might not be the answer.
If clinical depression even really exists, my definition of it would be when you find yourself sad or suicidal DESPITE having everything in your life as nice as you would like to have it. Every time my family tried to tell me to try medication, I would tell them “if I was waking up in a mansion with a beautiful family and chose to go cry in the corner all day, you could tell me that something is wrong with me”.
Is there something missing in your life that makes you sad? Or can you say you truly are one of those people who pretty much has a decent life put together and yet you still feel bad? If you feel you are depressed for no reason, then yes I would consider the medication. But first I would deeply ask yourself, is your depression trying to tell you something. Even if nothing comes to mind right away, if you think your life is mostly the way you’d like it to be, think for a while and maybe you will realize something. Is there a dream you’re not chasing? Is there a purpose you’re not fulfilling? Your depression might just be trying to tell you something.
If you can’t think of any reason why you feel this way and you just want it to stop, then maybe it is time to consider treatment.
Wellbutrin was the very first med I tried, lol 🙂 THAT one took 5 months because we cranked up the dosage size, tried Wellbutrin with Abilify and because Wellbutrin is known to fix other psych problems I have. Yeah my 2nd ex wife left me i miss both those chicks so I’m better off without a libido I was trying to work on myself these last 2 years.
I’m glad for people that found solutions they gave me hope. Rock on y’all.
@coitus Aww sorry it didn’t work out. (the drug and the ex-wives) My doc suggested adding Abilify but I don’t want to because I don’t think I need it and I didn’t like one of the possible side effects.
@lovely_sorrow O.o Yeah that would turn me off a drug too! I polled some people elsewhere on Wellbutrin when I first started taking it and everyone said they loved it, except one person who said it made her extremely paranoid, like she was convinced every stranger on the street was out to get her.
Thank you for all your comments. I truly appreciate them all, and helps me feel informed.
I have never tried medications, ever. And i have never wanted to be on them either. Personally I felt like I could deal with it, but 6 years later and I am still feeling like this, and I can tell that this time is worse, like another major episode i have had, it’s not going to go away, the other lasted 18 months, I was almost catatonic. I do not want that to happen again.
I want to feel numb. I self harm already to release all my feelings, now I just want to feel nothing. I want to be able to focus and not have severe mood swings like I have now. I can go from being affectionate and bubbly to SCREAMING and being filled with uncontrollable rage. I am sick of being so depressed over seemingly nothing, because that is so hard to explain.
When I update my mum about how i feel she always asks “Why?” and I have no answer. I just don’t want to live anymore, i can literally wake up like that, and within the hour change and maybe by the end of the night change again to wanting to self harm, my head filled with strange ideas and thoughts of suicide.
I don’t want to live like this any more. I just want to be ‘normal’ (whatever that is)
Thank you again, any advice is welcome!
solace, I wonder if you could be bipolar instead of “just” depressed?
@ SadBK I have had others say the same, I am unsure. Because i do not go through stages of clear manic and depressive stages I do not think that is what I could be.
My other issue is that recently I have been cutting again after almost 6 months of stopping, I am also CRAVING alcohol (which has NEVER happened) and my inner voice has become louder and more negative, to the point where I become sick and close to vomiting. I can explain more if any are interested.
Ah. I feel like I’m not manic enough either, to be bipolar. I was diagnosed back when they called it manic depressive… BUT, that was like the “in” thing for doctors to diagnose people with at the time. And they gave me that after talking to me all of 3 minutes. I’ve read accounts from bipolar people and the manic periods are REALLY manic… the depression tends to last a lot longer. I would love to experience a manic period right about now!
Craving alcohol… hmm, sounds dangerous. Trying meds to get control of that inner voice sounds like a good idea. If you’d like to explain more I will listen.
@SadBK
It is usually a rare occurance, where my inner voice (so just mine, not multiple and no one else’s but my own) will just constantly say negative things to me, one of the most common ones is “You are nothing, I am nothing” over and over. The other day it got to be so bad that my voice started SCREAMING inside my head, I had a major headache and could not focus or talk to anyone because of it and at times was to the point of vomiting and total exhaustion.
Anything that happened that day my voice would have a retort. For example, I go to University and while there I said something that made the whole class laugh, but the voice screamed “They pity you, you are nothing to them. They hate you, you are disgusting. Don’t take up their time, you IDIOT!!” Stuff like that. These thoughts usually occur once in a while, maybe once or twice a year depending on how my depression is. But these episodes have been happening two or three times a week minimum for the past month.
I have NEVER in my life “craved” alcohol, it’s the weirdest feeling and for that reason I have abstained from it just in case it could become an abusive habit. But the thought that I have two beers in the fridge right now, calms me down. I guess it’s because I know i can alter my mood at any time, I can control how I feel in some way. If you know what i mean.
So in the end, were you diagnosed with something different?
Aww, you know the voice is a liar, right?
I used to think if I talked about such a voice, people might think I’m schizo. So I’d always say “I know the voice is me.” Seems like a lot of depressed people here have such a voice too. Talking back to the voice doesn’t work for me… the voice can dismiss anything I say as utter crap. But having it shut down with meds? (at least I think it’s the meds… the psychiatrist thinks so too) I’ll take it. Maybe after shitloads of therapy I’ll be able to talk back to it and have what I say to it “stick.” I dunno.
Be strong and keep the alcohol there as comfort only!
I was diagnosed with depression. I truly don’t know if that’s accurate, though. Now THAT seems to be the in thing to diagnose people with. The first time I went to a doctor on my own, to get meds, I said what the internet told me I was supposed to say, and I got a prescription easily. Was I very sad at the time? Yes, definitely. Clinically depressed, though? I really don’t know. It’s always triggered by an event. It’s never just for “no reason” like yours. I talked about that some with my current psychiatrist, and told her why I sometimes think I don’t have depression, and she said it doesn’t matter whether I “really” have it or not, that after all this time of having the symptoms, my brain chemistry IS altered. So… I still don’t know?
Rather than going into all that all the time though I will say I’m depressed. It’s true enough.
I’m strictly against the use of anti-deppresents and neurochemically man made substances. For good reason. MAOI’s , Prozak, SSRI’s, All synthethic substances that influence 5HT and other mood based neuro-transmitters. Such as anti-psychotica and anti-deppresiva.
My little brother was even more depressed than I am and got diagnosed. He was prescribed SSRI’s, 3 days later he was admitted to the hospital with a brain hemorage.
Anti-deppresants caused major anxiety attacks and psychosis to my dad and my little brother. My dad developed on the long term a brain decease that was linked to his use of anti-depressants.
If you want to look into ‘substances’ and be safe. Look into Psycho-psychedelic therapy. Even if this is taboo, or illigal pretty much everywhere else in the world.
The recommendation of anti-depressents and other man made synthethic brain chemicals is absolutely fucking destructive and criminal, if you start taking anti-depressants you might aswell kill yourself right away. As these kill your inner bieng and disconnect you from your higher self.