I’m not afraid to die….

….I’m afraid to live. But I guess I am going to try. I tried to kill myself by overdose but it didn’t work and I had to spend some time in a mental place. To say the least, it didn’t do a thing. I am still depressed, and occasionally I still want to just stop living. The only reason I don’t kill myself is because I have people I love. I can’t hurt them. I am on different pills now, but I have issues staying asleep and have started having panic attacks. I want therepy but we can’t seem to set up a meeting. I am starting to think I will never get help. And that’s bad. Because I am getting bad again. I just want to get some help. I want to be happy again but I guess it isn’t gonna happen. Oh well. I’ll try.