Do you ever think about if you were to kill yourself who all would blame themselves for your death? Like if your bestfriend blamed themselves because they didn’t take you serious enough or your ex would blame themselves because they broke your heart and weren’t there when you needed them the most to because you were taken advantage of in your sleep? Or the girl/boy you like would blame themselves for saying hurtful things to you? Or your mom/dad would blame themselves because they make you feel guilty for everything you do?
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Many people might feel guilty and “take the blame†but to my mind that’s as selfish and narcissistic as someone killing themselves with the hope of hurting others.
Suicide it is a personal matter, the most personal, a final expression that is about the person committing suicide.
To take the blame for someone else’s actions takes away responsibility and respect.
How ironic that a person who kills themselves feeling they have no control in their life or choices and needs don’t matter, final act about them, is taken away.
I will fully take responsiblilty for ALL of my own actions and choices in life. The blame shoudld not be put on anyone but myself because these are my feelings and my choices that I make in this life that I live. However, when I wrote that blog, I had contacted all of those peole and they either pushed it aside or laughed or just didnt care. Which got me to thinking that if those were their last actions or words or moments with me, would they look back on them and realize that those were the moments where they could have done something to help me. to save me from everything im feeling.
I imagine that the best way to answer that question might be to think: Would you blame yourself if your best friend committed suicide? If your ex did? If the girl/boy that liked you did? If your parents/children did?
If we kill ourselves, probably, for better of for worse, some people that we would want to feel guilty, wouldn’t feel guilty at all, and others that had no hand in making us feel bad, might take on the blame undeservedly. Nothing would change with the first group, and the second group shouldn’t suffer because of what we did. It may be a no-win situation. 🙁
If the tables were turned and I was one of those people and I could make different choices than they did, I would not feel guilty. I would have done anything and everything to help out the person who was stuggling with the thoughts of suicide and with the thoughts of self harm. I would have done everything in my power to help that person instead of just not taking them seriously or not being there for them when they called me and needed me there for them the most or I wouldnt of strung them along for over 5 months and constantly give them false hope and I deffently would not of bashed them and bring them down for every single thing that did not match my standards. If I were any one of those peolethatI went to for help, things would of ended in a better result.