My boyfriend and I just got in a fight. Beginning because I wouldn’t send him pictures. He got mad because I sent ONE to a kid over a year ago, as I went through my freshman slut phase. I told him it was a mistake and not to talk about. But he kept dwelling on it. I started crying because this is what it causing my pain again. People bringing up the old me and bashing on me. He kept asking why I was crying and I just kept telling him he wouldn’t understand. Finally, I reminded him of my depression, which he then reminded me he once held a gun to his mouth. I told him is has different affects on different people. He kept yelling at me and I told him to stop acting like he knew everything. I hung up on him. He texted me, “This is why you’re the immature one. Because you do stuff like this.” I hate this. I just wish I had someone who wouldn’t fight with me nonstop everyday. I always see those happy couples who sometimes squabble over something silly. I bet they don’t fight over the stuff my boyfriend and I do. We almost broke up in the heat of the fight that started because I was sniffing while I had my cold and he was trying to watch a movie. Just..why? I hate hanging out with my only guy friend sometimes because I can’t help but wonder, would we fight if we dated? Would he treat me this way? And I have to shake the thought away because I’m “in love” with my boyfriend. And I am. I’m in love with the good in him that I get to see sometimes. And I have a deep hatred for the bad side in him because he yells at me and insults me. I’m beginning to wonder about him being bipolar or having a slight case of multiple personality disorder. The psychology teacher at my school explained some small symptoms of it, which he matches almost too perfectly. But then I remember, he grew up without a dad due to him being drugged out, so he was raised with 3 girls and no male influences. So of course he’d be somewhat moody and sensitive, and have my lady friends than guy friends. But here I am, making up these dumb excuses like it’s okay what he said to me 5 minutes ago. And it’s not okay. If I can feel my tear-stained cheeks, it’s not okay.