Its always darkest before the dawn

So ive never been a blogger or anythig but I would like to share my story so people can relate. When I was younger I was bullied at home and at school. My dad was always very mean to us whicj is sadly common. I was a very sick child and they thought I would die at an early age. I was very skinny where you coul see all my ribs and my eyes sunk in. People often made fun of me at school for being so sick. I was bullied all through elementry school for being ugly,sick, and dumb. Life was very hard for me and at the age of nine was when I first started conteplating suicide. But I held on to my faith to keep me alive. In highschool I became pretty and outgoing. But I always had fake friends and noone ever knew I was actually a self harmer. Finally my senior year became to overwhelming and I had to go to a mental institution and cutting became worse than ever. Everyone found out and started talking. My best friend told me it was my problem not hers and left me as a friend and a guy I had once been in love with said that wasnt what popular people did and basically it would look bad on him to associate with me anymore. But through everything I am learning to forgive my dad and the people who have hurt me. I have met my twobest frieds that have stuck by my side and they dont use me like my other “friends”did. I try and stay constantly close to God and help others and offer up my pain for other people. If you are depressed, been bullied, have bpolar disorder or post traumatic stress and looking for someone to understand well I do. And I want you to know you are your own kind of beautiful and to create or pain into beauty. If you want to ever talk Im here to listen.