I see myself driving to the bridge. I see myself popping some pills and driving. it’s the middle of the night and its pitch black outside. I reach the halfway point in the bridge, I slow down and pull over. I have my backpack neatly prepared on the passenger seat. I leave it there to be found. Inside is my cell phone and my journals. its so clear and I am calm. I exit my car and head to the rail. I climb over take one last breath and fall backwards into the water. These thoughts make me feel free. The urge is getting stronger and my visualizations are vivid it feels real.