Guilt Trips..

I wanted to say something about this the other day, but i wasn’t ready.

I think it has something to do with Them knowing they Are guilty for causing You so much pain that you would act on it in a destructive way… and then they twist that into “you’re doing something to hurt them,” and try to make you feel bad about it, believing it will stop you.

It’s basically them resorting to what they “feel” should be an effective method of altering your behavior.

It’s hard to properly articulate, but i’ve dealt with this quite a lot in my life, and am either equally disgusted by it, or even more. Few things “push my buttons” faster than guilt trips, especially those least called-for. When they are used arbitrarily, for trivial reasons, i see RED. I feel Green. I need to go Hulk-Mode, but i have to try to be a Jedi, instead. I usually say something sharp or insensitive in response, without meaning to, because i can’t help it. Abrasive words are usually better than lashing out in physical aggression. But i still feel bad about how i can’t seem to avoid being sharp or harsh in response to the needless guilt trips. It makes me want to stare a hole through someone’s face, or just literally explode. I can often barely hide a look of disgust on my face.

When being “guilt-tripped,” i almost never feel guilt. Instead, i feel a nearly uncontrollable rage, due to the offense taken at the employment of such tactics.

Have you ever been *so angry* that your entire body aches?

I want to scream… but i don’t. I usually just clench my jaw, close my eyes, pause, breathe, and then whatever words come out, are “better than losing it.”

How can i be nice to someone who wants me to feel guilty?