Home Poetry & Art If only you knew
Report Post

If only you knew

by Zinthias

Maybe someday I’ll tell you about all of my pain. Maybe someday I’ll tell you that the real reason as to why I don’t sleep very much at night is because I’m just that scared of what might happen to you while I sleep. I want to protect you so much, but you’re not even here. The real reason why I cut is to know that everything isn’t an illusion. When will I tell you that? When will I tell you all the things that trouble me? When will I stop using depression as an excuse? Why can’t I pick myself up anymore? You tell me I’m strong, but underneath me is not solid ground. It’s water, and I don’t know how to swim anymore. When will I tell you how bad my schizophrenia really is? About the inner voice inside of me that I converse with before making a decision? About my panic attacks? About all of the other nameless things that happen to me because of it? When will I be able to admit that one sickness has probably caused the other? When will I bet able to tell you about all of the other countless things? The answer is never, unless I become dirty sober in two minutes.

1 comment
0

Related posts

1 comment

smusmu 7/31/2013 - 4:53 am

I dont know who you wanted to tell how you feel, but I read your post. I hear you, I am willing to listen more…

Leave a Comment