My name is John and I and 19. I have no real friends to speak of, I’ve lost interesting in the only thing that has been really keeping me going and I’ve been wishing the past few years for something to happen that would get me killed. I can’t commit suicide because my mind and body physically won’t allow me to do so. I don’t know when exactly I started feeling the way i did, but the feeling has only grown stronger over the years especially in the last few months.
I have no job, no drivers license because i can’t afford the insurance, no friends that bother to check up on me or care how I’m doing and no reason to go out anymore. I don’t think I’ve ever really had anyone ask me if i wanted to go do something ever. I have no one to talk with about my life, my real problem or anything. I used to be more faithful in God, but the past month I’ve just been losing it more and more. I’m nearing the end of my rope and i know the impact of death will be relatively unnoticed at this point.
I don’t know why I’m bothering to write this. I don’t think anything anyone can say will do anything for me.