When just five years ago I couldn’t even talk and I was in hospitals and here I am like a normal person
having tons of friends on facebook(although I may not talk to them all) im still out there.
I drive a nice car, Thanks to my dad cosigning, I go to school now
even though im super nervous and yea I still go to malls even though its early in the morning when its first open
to avoid people(I used to love the mall) I find what works for me and im okay with that,Im sometimes just happy
to be out there in the mix… I hate that I get vain sometimes
Im not struggling that much, I have a boyfriend
I sometimes come out pretty in pictures and here I am unhappy with what I have…I just need to look’
back and remember how things used to be back then
I mean im going to Sephora tomorrow to return a lipgloss to get another lipgloss lmao Yea I got it bad
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4 comments
I wanna beat myself up sometimes
I guess its sad to realize how I used to be and how I am now,Im just so opposite Im shut in now and im afraid of people,thats not how it used to be,I always have my phone in my hand or my keys,but that’s what works for me
I don’t think you are selfish or vain. You are only the victim of beauty fascism like many other women.
Hey Now22, congratulations on surviving 🙂
But yes, traumatic experiences haunt us for a long time. It’s great that you can take small steps. Reminding yourself how far you’ve come.
There’s nothing wrong with a little vanity if it gets you through the day. On rare occasions when my hair doesn’t look like a cactus plant, I can go out in public and actually feel like part of the human community. Like you said it always feels a little strange, but if it works even for a few hours, go for it. Thanks for posting this.