So this is life. multidimensional, multilevelled. trying to make one thing better only disrupts some other. is it a balance? I wander my thoughts here, and voila! it lightens up, showing me itself, opening its ways and paths, lightening my future. then somethings happens. my thoughts wander to some other thing (they are no longer in my control…i am in control of them). what is it? its bad memory or view of my past. it also lightens up (against my wish) and shows itself. a barrier in path. it slanders my previous thought and all emotions attached to it. now why isn’t this new thought moving, being slandered by some other latest thought? why? it has made home in my mind now. it will stay. an uninvited guest, but also an old guest.