Awkward Day

Hi everyone, so today was the weirdest day in English. My class and I are reading Fahrenheit 451  and we got to a part where Guy Montag’s wife Mlidred overdosed on sleeping pills. So, of course my teacher had us stop there and she started talking about the book’s society. Then she got into suicide. As she was talking about overdosing and what it does to you, I tried to stop listening to her because I been wanting to OD for a while now. Eventually, I heard the word “cut” from my teacher’s mouth and I wanted to start breaking down crying. Suicide really affects me, especially when people talk about it to me and they don’t even know I’m suicidal. Then a girl, she’s the popular girl in my grade made a comment. “Why would people want to die? Life is so awesome and it’s short. I don’t understand.” You should understand! You bully girls like me (a nerd and a hearing loss child) and you don’t think it affects anyone! I wanted to rip her head off after she made that comment, but I didn’t. Thank god that bell rang or I would’ve flipped. I hate when people mention suicide to me. It makes me want to slap them across the face and how they think it’s stupid and the girls/boys who committed were looking for attention. We’re not! We are seriously hurt inside and outside of our bodies and no one seem to understand that. I’m really afraid to go back to English tomorrow and we’re still talking about the same topic: suicide. Anyways, that was my day basically, besides getting a 75% on my History Test I took before Thanksgiving.