Now what…

So my boss just screwed me again today. Says no work for 3 weeks. I’ve been working overtime. Why no work. I have no car, no license. I’m unemployable. This shit gig is the only thing to pay the bills and there are lots from my framed dui charge last year. Thinks I have a bad attitude at work…he puts me down all the time. Hes like mr potter and scrooge make a baby every year around Christmas since his son died. I live a mile from work. They all say the same. Came home from working crying. Mom asked what’s wrong…told her. She must have sensed what I was thinking. Told me I can’t kill myself. It would stab her. I’ve been planning my suicide for months. I’m really close… I almost jumped off a bridge after work today. Only reason I didn’t jump was the damn thing wasn’t high enough. Don’t want to drown in ice water. The train looks pretty tempting at this point. I’ve always wanted to go to California though. If I jump off the golden gate 200ft means water is like concrete. The railing is so low and they haven’t put up the suicide net yet. I wish I could make it look like an accident. Maybe if it looks like an accident my mom and dad won’t be so broke up about it.