pain forward

1st complete year in muay thai classes and some fights,i had cronic depression since 15 .i love to smoke leaf of poweerd,i smoke aibce was 15 because of my depression.life was shit every day,my depresion was hand to hand by anxiety and that shit was killing me from inside.my psichologist told me to do something i liked,sonething that motivates me to go on and fight forward.but nothing seemed to pull me forward.i started drinking and smoking the green leaf constabtly.i was fucking sick.having dairy antidepressives and my favourite mirtazapine and i loved trankimazin but l quited after aa big puking addiction.then one day at a second everything changed my friends and i started getting into fights (not because of us,we are prety pacific,most of times to defend a friend in a club or something like that)and what?i like it! I love that adrenaline rush and those big hot punches it was a battle i loved it.i started training muay thai and that art just change my life,i became fit physically and mentally i trained boxing earlier so i have a good base.so i started training and like it muchthat punches,jjlumps,kicks,that rush again it was incredible,at a time of 1 year i had my first fight which i losr by points .im training really hard now hard sparring every friday.all that strength ,that perfection,that pure animal instinct,that punches that just make me happy”and thats my reason to keep forward and keep fighting one day more until i cant anymore,my depreion got much better,many people i talk dont understand why i like to fight and being punched but for me is life andd human puriity the same affect you have for ypur money i haveit fo my sport