Don’t know if I can take it anymore.

I’m just completely lost. I don’t know if I should end it already. I’ve been put through so much bullshit that I’m completely fed up. I was molested by my dad’s friend which my dad doesn’t know about because I was young and scared that he’d do something to my family cause he claimed he will if I ever told. I still haven’t said anything and it’s been years. I’ve also be bullied by everyone. Even my own family. I’ve always been really into sports and I’m a girl so my parents, sisters, and brother would always call me a boy because of it. Also, kids at school would do the same. I’m a current freshman and I’m done with life. Theres no motivation to continue on with life. I have so much anger toward people that I dont want to deal with.  I’m two different people. To my friends, they know me as a happy, full of life, big hearted girl… well everyone knows me like that. I can’t trust anyone with my personal stuff so they never think anything is ever wrong with me. I hate having to act like something I’m not, but its becoming second nature to me which isn’t good. I’m currently into drugs and drinking which isn’t good cause i play soccer. Soccer is the only thing that gets me away from all of the bullshit, but my parents don’t let me play it unless it’s at school… and that only lasts a few months. Once that’s over, i go back to my depression and drugs and I’m afraid I’ll end up doing something stupid which i want to do. I don’t know what to do anymore…