m.A.A.d city

We listen to objectively vulgar, demeaning, and strange music. The lyrics hold meaning that are not widely accepted by society. To me, and I’m sure plenty of other teenagers, the lyrics hold a different meaning. Those who know serious emotional and psychological struggle see those lyrics as refreshing, and symbolizing an encouragement intended to help deal with the struggle. That’s how I see it, anyways. Opinions are like anuses.My generation astounds me, negatively and positively. They act out particular behaviors that are cliche for a teenager, but these “punks” are still human beings. They have the same brain every other human has; only teenager brain’s are going through stages of development. Depending on the stimuli they are subjected to, they may possess the same behaviors/perspectives when they age. When I was younger, I believed the struggles of a child/teenager would disappear as I aged. Of course, not everyone has the same environment/stimuli as I have. That is what sets us all apart from each other, and often makes it difficult for me to form “educated guesses” on the psychology of my peers. This is why it is good for teenagers to be able to socialize. There are safety and “proper development” issues, concerning how much teenagers are exposed to socially. Then there’s the huge bang, the icebreaker; we have to learn responsibility, loyalty, common sense, and a little bit of leadership in order for us to “succeed”, or deal with the bullshit in store for us in the lovely world of adulthood. The real world. I’m beginning to believe that none of it is real. I base most of my conclusions on psychology research, and simple observation. I try my best to manipulate my parents into cutting my curfews in order for me to “stomp all over hell and 40 acres”. I hold enough common sense to know where I should be, shouldn’t be, and who I should(n’t) be with. I’m doing my best to prove that to the ‘rents. My usual method, in every day life, is to discover my limits. You can only do that by getting into something you probably shouldn’t be. I try and pick an offense or violation that’s small, so it wont fuck me over so much in the future. I haven’t done that yet at school, and I’ve concluded it’s because I have an inner intimidation of the school. I don’t want my grades to decline due to a suspension, but I could handle a day of I.S.S. All I have to do is pick a scenario that would have the consequences of I.S.S. I’m not so intimidated by the SRO Officer, the principals, nor the staff in general. I just don’t want my act of rebellion to mess anything up in my hidden agenda. My rebellion would line me up directly with the “authoritarians” of the school, which will give me the opportunity to see who they really are.I’m confident in my steps, metaphorically and physically, because I know that whatever move I make, it holds a purpose. Everything I do, I do it covertly to numb myself, cope with my realities, and move onto a new plateau of intelligence, enlightenment, and manipulation. I undergo loads of self-destruction, but what better way to learn than through pain?