Same Sad Song

soooooo, you guessed it!!!! Im thinken of ending it all, its not a happy time. Id rather not go into my life fuck ups or the whys and hows of my shittyness. Instead ill go the other route……Why people say killing yourself is a bad thing. 1) that life will get better…Your right it will but…like anything else it will also get worse. 2) there is always love in the future…for you!! ok so i shouldnt kill myself because someone might..MIGHT love me in the future… soooooo I wait and deal in this shitty world for a girl to come along and say ” hey your depressed alot and dont make much money and are a little slow so I think im in love with you” Maybe not just like that but measuring your own self worth on someone else is really dumb, like, they love me so now i love me AWESOME!!!!! 3) Your friends and family will be really upset. That does suck but really if you WERE thinking of me maybe we would talk sometime, more than once a year, sure i could drop you a line but in my mind yall are happy and im NOT so its best if i keep that GREAT sadness away from you and allow you to stay happy. 3.5) connected to 3) Its selfish to kill your self. Interseting……NO ONE thinks of the Baby when they have one so isnt that a selfish act? So im thinking selfish comen in to life and selfish going out. 4) Its a cowards way out. You might be right on that one but i am taking my life or rather controling my own life by taking it and that takes GUTS. WE really dont know what happens after we die, we can guess, god this devil that but no one really knows, so at best…..NOTHING no pain no hurt no questions no answers NOTHING. and at worst……eternity in the worst thing possible (kinda sounds like life to me) but probley worse right…… cant really figure odds of the whole god thing being right but honestly there is NO evidence, but thats just me. Yall can believe what you want. 5) There are so many places to go and things to experience. OK im sure you are right there sure are but what does that matter, You shouldnt always believe that the grass is greener on the other side sometimes you gota just DEAL with what you got…..and for me its a shitty life where i dont allow people to get close because i CANT.  Im ALWAYS unhappy things RARLEY get good, better? sure things do get better and worse and worse and then better but NEG is always Neg no matter what gets added. ok so this is ending up really long and im gonna stop, if you did read all this, congrats but dont shit on your shitty life. If you think i should add something to my list let me know or if you think i got something wrong also let me know………..ALWAYS Singing the Same SAd Song——-JAY