Nightmares

So these dreams that I have they are all from that voice I hear and shadow I see. All these dreams of gruesome murders I hate it. They don’t stop first it was Adam even though he passed that thing uses him against me in my dreams. Then my dad he passed away so much blood and gunshots that from that day I hated loud noises. In my dreams he makes me remember everything that happened that day. Then my cousins brother I forgot how he looked but I remember he committed suicide by hanging himself. So in the dreams he has a blank face just hiding in the shadows. My friend Jose was killed cause of me and my fcking mistakes. He uses that against me too. Then my friend Adrian from STEP died from overdose. I blamed myself for it I told him to stop he didn’t listen. So he uses Adrian against ne too. That thing uses my most precious people in my memory and everything I can do to remember them against me. Isn’t it great knowing that you were the cause for all and even single death that has come in my life. That thing doesn’t let me sleep I don’t want to cause then they come. I just want to sleep I don’t care about having him best me just leave them out and let me sleep. That thing likes getting into stuff that doesn’t involve it. Just stop giving me nightmares about how they died and why they died. Just let me have sleep for once. Fcking nightmares I know its my fault hitched doesn’t have to remind me right. Mr. Shadow here thinks otherwise. Anyways ill try to sleep now