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Quack Quack


I hate how you’re just born out of nowhere forced to go to school and get an education,so you can get a job.What if I wanted to be a duck?


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Shephard 4/18/2014 - 12:44 am

You ever done a duck walk for 200 metres wearing a full combat load minus field pack and holding a machine gun? You won’t like it, mate. I sure as hell do not envy ducks one bit. My fuckin’ legs had never hurt so much. Plus we had to do it again since some fucktard thought that ducks made a miaow noise instead of quacking.


BIGRICH 4/18/2014 - 12:51 am

lol but I guess if you’re a duck you’re o.k. ducks wouldn’t like walking like a human much either.

StruggleOn 4/18/2014 - 12:54 am

What if I wanted to be a fennec fox who ran a kissing booth [which is not free and are paid by in PopTarts] and handed out pins that said “I <3 Ross Perot", and I had enough money to travel to Colombia and get fucked up on scoplamine.

Point it – I learned to stop dwelling on the things I can not have no matter the effort [aka, logically impossible].

Why couldn't you be a duck? Probably because you weren't meant to.

Shephard 4/18/2014 - 1:01 am

Hmm…this gives me an idea for a warry fuckin’ mighty duck.

“The world has advanced aeons ahead of 28th century developments. Multi billion dollar corporations have harnessed industries to effect scientific pursuits unlike any other before. The Manhattan Project was just the beginning. In a lab far secluded from prying eyes in South America, a hybrid creature remains in stasis. Half man, half duck, and a whole lotta trouble: Michael Quackson awakens from his slumber and breaks free of his human masters. With a trail of destruction behind him and a defined objective ahead in which he must find the one who created him; Michael will stop at nothing until it’s time to fly south. Duck N Cover – Coming this Winter to cinemas worldwide. Rated Q for Quack Up.”

M 4/18/2014 - 1:04 am

Donald Duck on a tight spandex suit made in Jim henson’s style (animatronics) came to mind while reading that description

TheRiver 4/18/2014 - 1:15 am

lol…how drunk are you right now Shephard?

But seriously… that’s goddamn genius.

Shephard 4/18/2014 - 1:17 am

Could possibly turn it into an anime – that’d be so much win. With the poorly dubbed English thrown in as well.

Shephard 4/18/2014 - 1:28 am

I refute that most unfounded claim! If I were drunk, my grammar would go out the window. Ooh, there it goes now!

Lol. I’m pretty sure I’m sober, I think it’s my medication toying with me, or perhaps my overzealous imagination. Dunno. I thought of that just off the bat, you like it? Have it. Turn it into an actual screenplay 🙂

TheRiver 4/18/2014 - 1:42 am

I would if I could, I assure you, good sir. Just to see it happen. Forget Ironman and Captain America, put your hands in the air for Michael Quackson, the new hero of our generation! We could even start thinking about a sequel, Duck N Cover 2 – Back in Quack. He just needs a badass Arnold-esque catchphrase…how about “I’m about to quack you up!” …lol , maybe not.

Shephard 4/18/2014 - 1:56 am

Hmm… “I’ll be quack” could work. He needs a power up word too. Perhaps in the vain of Captain Marvel: “Sh-QUACK” and then he just goes apeshit wrecking goons left, right and centre.

lorax 4/18/2014 - 2:04 am



The fates hate me.

Shephard 4/18/2014 - 2:16 am

I want to be a macaque – They have such great hair, and kick back in the mountain hot springs all day long. Noice.

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