Depression triggered from a heartbreak and how it has ruined my life.

I am young. The love of my life recently left me a few months back, my friends left me too because they did not want to deal with the tension between us. Suddenly I am gone, I am not there anymore. I am in my twenties and in college, my parents say perhaps the best thing for me is to move to a new city and start again. I can live with my mother in that city and need not to worry about society, which I have totally withdrawn from. Maybe they are right, maybe they are not. The pain is excruciating. I cannot describe it in words, it feels like someone has poisoned my heart with lethal rat poison and I am dying a slow painful death. I cannot eat not drink, I have lost 5kg in a mere two months, became skinny. Everyday I cry, wanting to kill myself. Everyone hates me because I have always been trouble. I create more harm then good were my own brothers words, he hates me too for messing up my fathers health with my depression. It seems like this pain is endless. I am becoming anorexic because I am unable to eat from my depression. I have slit my wrists because I am so depressed. I cry to sleep every night because I am so depressed. All I think about is suicide but I know I could not bare to do that because it would hurt my parents. My parents are the only people who care for me in this life it seems, they do so much just to keep me alive, and for what? I don’t understand why? I have been a failure my whole life, I have screwed up every step of the way and they just keep supporting me. I wish they would allow me to disintegrate into the midst. Everything is gone, my career, my lively hood everything has gone because of this. I have no motivation, I see no light in the tunnel. What makes it worse is everyone names me the pathetic waster. The insane woman who went crazy after having her heart broken, they say I am a true loser. Society is just throwing more painful words at me, as if it is egging me onto killing myself. But let me ask you to be in my position, then would you call me insane and pathetic? Everyone left me, my parents are my only friends :(. I got no motivation to live, I have lost so much weight, all I do is sleep everyday. I am on medicine, anti-depressants, they do not work anymore, my brain constantly feels fried. I have no personality anymore, I was once a bubbly young woman, now a hermit with no sense of self. All I feel is sadness. Everyone keeps telling me I am a loser, who wallows in self pity. Maybe I am. Everyone keeps telling me I am insane for still loving someone, maybe I am. Everyone says I am mental, a waster who has ruined my families life. Everyone says I cause nothing but trouble. I know I am pathetic and I should stand up on my two feet, but the depression is not letting me do anything. I wish someone could help pull me out of this, I wish there was someone there for me to talk to, someone who would understand. I need help :/.