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im slowly killing myself in ways that go un-noticed until its to late

by annathesadgirl

so hi… to be honest i dont know what i am supposed to put on here so im going to try this. yes i am very sad,

no my dad doesnt rape me. no my family does not hit me. actually my moms side of the family is nice ..

my dad does drink all the time. my mom is very stressed, my sister hates everything and my brother is bullied, people are very mean to me for being diffrent , and liking things normal 14 year olds would like… im the girl you walk by in the mall who has eye liner every where and all black and your mom looks at you and she shakes her head. im also the girl who is called “hoe” “slut” and nameslike those. i came to this website to see if anyone understands me… i mean i hardly understand myself but still… ummm i dont if any one will actaully take the time to read this but if you do please comment and tell me if im not insane

 

have you ever wanted to die?

 

have you ever been up at 3 in the morning crying feeling so sad you use a piece of metal to cut your wrist or thigh or where ever open… and it makes you feel better ??

 

have you ever felt worthless? yep thats me i cant stop cutting. or crying. i want to die you know it sucks.  pills dont help, talking to a person  who doesnt even know who understands me, they just went to collage and now they think they can talk to me about it, and they sit in there chair stairing at me nodding there head, because thats what there getting paid to do. well i have to go but i will finish this later

 

 

 

 

i want all of you to know . if you feel the way i do, your amazing , and perfect.. please dont give up i love you

 

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2 comments

Broken Toy 7/9/2014 - 12:23 am

Hi, I really can relate to you… I have kind of a goth style and a lot of people think I’m a weirdo… I normaly feel better after cutting myself but there’s a small feeling of gilt because of feeling better from hurting myself…. I hope you’re doing fine… I’ve been a bit unstable lately… Feel free to write if you want to talk… I’ll listen…

Hugs
Stay strong

nunaa 7/9/2014 - 12:42 am

My answersthe first question : Yes

second question : no, I can’t cry

And the last one : yes ,but not anymore

I know you don’t want the answer
and I want you to know that you are amazing you really are handling all of this in your age..
Keep it up and be your family’s hero I think they do need hero and I think you are the right one
read about self-development
It maybe what you need and then you can try to change your family start with yourself
I don’t mean change yourself you are great the way you are just add different flavors to your personality

if you don’t understand youself let me help you by what I understand from you
normal teen girl who want to change her lifestyle and don’t know where to start from..strong. .. and do care about what others say … kind to and supportive

* you cant control what other’s say about you some people will just keep hating on you no matter how perfect you are …need proof? ?
Search for famous people and see what others say about them you will always find haters who see nothing good in that person

you can control your reaction to their words or deeds ..agnor them and if they choose to hate you choose not to hate them cuz when hate person you will bother yourself

*advice faith , health, well sleep, and self development your new best friends

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