My sucky ass life story

Okay first post so I guess I just can vent here and that’s what I’m going to do. I’m now a senior in high school and this is pretty much going to say everything about me. I’ve never really had friends growing up and it’s hard for me to socialize. As a kid I was just loud and annoying, along with being weird fat and ugly. But I was a happy kid, even without real friends. Middle school is when it starting going downhill. I started going online more and more and discovered online chat rooms where of course there’s a billion pedophiles looking for kids like me. At school I had two “friends” who I never really trusted because they always talked behind my back. One even called me a pig before. But they were the closest things I had to real friends (pathetic right) Anyway, I kept getting picked on more and more and slowly began my depression. My sister was going through a similar phase but she was more obvious that she was upset. My parents never knew what I was doing or how badly I hated everything. They still don’t know, which hurts a lot after seeing them catch my sister and her getting more help and support. All the while I kept going on these chatrooms, learning about things I really didn’t understand yet, and then they started asking for pictures. I started sending pics around 7th grade and it felt great to have attention and compliments when you never hear them in real life. Then as my depression grew I started talking to much much older men. I’ve heard stories of girls meeting guys from the internet and killing them and I secretly hoped that would happen because I just wanted to die. No one cared and I hated everything about myself so why bother? I had also (kinda?) tried to kill myself 3 times. I had tried to drown myself twice and I tried to slit my own throat but I couldn’t go through with it. So kidnapped was the best answer for me. I had given out my address and send dirty photos of myself at such a young age. It sucked. I even got stalked by one guy for a while until he gave up. Again no one has ever been told all this until now. So it was a lot to handle by myself. Then I got a webcam and started going on cam sites. One man had figured out my Facebook and threatened to send pics out to everyone on there if I didn’t masturbate for him on webcam which I did, while crying the whole time. Then  a miracle happens! I move away right before high school. I move to a place where no one knows me and  I become more accepted. I had lost a lot of weight but was still weird. I made so many friends at that school. But I have social anxiety and I couldn’t hang out with them as much as they wanted. Then during the first part of junior year I had moved again, and now I’m in this shithole with no friends. My family is very poor now. We are on food stamps, my dad lost his job, and now we have 6 people in a tiny ass Milhouse. I can hardly see my friends and when I can I have no money to do anything. On top of this shit cake I’m questioning my sexuality, in a religious house. This is a short summary of what my life is like because if I posted more it’d be alooooot longer. So yeah