Im just done. I cannot take this anymore. I can no longer handle being shoved around or not having anyone there for me. Its just to overwhelming, to stressful, to depressing. I feel so alone. Nothing matters. Numbness is my bestfriend. Im just not enough to hold up all this weight. No one would see this coming. I never showed a sign of hurt when they called me those names. Saying i looked aneroxic and that no one likes me. Really they just pushed it and hid it furthet and further deep down inside of me. But one human being can only take so much. Theres not enough space in my body, soul, or mind to accompany anymore hurtful words, thoughts, or actions. There is a point where it’s to much. Theres no way out, no escape. No red flashing exit to escape the pain. Just an alternative to end it all. As long as youre alive in this world youre trapped in a realm of hate and disgust. Theres just no turning back. Once you see it you cant unsee it. Everything lingers in your mind wanting to be set free but no word, no phrase can ever satisfy the thirst of release in your mind. No word can tell you how hurt i am. No word can release my anger. I cant explain the numbness i feel when i cry for countless hours till i fall asleep. I wonder, if our world is so “great”. Why do i feel like this? I also wonder why people die of cancer. Those people fight to stay alive! They want to. Im not and i dont. I wish if or when i kill myself i could save someone else from sorrow who wants to live. I just cry and hurt because the feelings will never go away. It will always be there. I like to think it doesnt matter how wide the cut it but how deep. The farther the knife is pushed in the more you hurt and bleed. I just want to know. When do people realize theyve gone to far?.. Does something tragic really need to happen for someone to know they have crossed the line? I guess so… i guess no body believes it until they see me.