I’m scared. Everything in my life is spiraling out of control.
I’m a failure. My family and friends are trying to support me, but all I can feel is their pity. And I hate it. I hate it so much. I just want to get away from everyone, and away from reality. I want to get drunk. Like so drunk that I don’t even know what’s happening, and just stay that way. And not have any worries.
I want to scream, and cry, and fucking hit something. I feel so angry and mad and.. I just don’t think I’m cut out for life. I paint a smile on my face everyday and people think I’m always happy and okay and problem-free and.. and I’m not. I am a train wreck inside. And I’m the only one that can feel it, or that even knows the train has crashed. It’s crashed and burned.
Just fuck this world. And fuck everyone. I want to go asleep and never wake up.
I just can’t handle this anymore.