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date set…

by kateralia

As the title says, I have set the date. I am so very very tired.

I have moved with my friend & her kids into her boyfriend’s house & its not a picnic. I basically live in the garage since its a 3 bed house & her 2 kids have finally got their own room.

I keep saying ‘it’s a roof over my head’ & ‘I could be on the street’. But I think I might prefer anywhere else but here.

He wakes up at 5am to go to work,  so everyone is awake, including me who gets woken by the garage door. Mind you, I have a sleeping problem. Most days I cant get to sleep till 2 or 3am. So the past 2 weeks I have been running on about 3 hrs sleep a night.

Plus the area we live in is 2kms away from the nearest bus stop.  Now that makes it very hard for me to get around.

Also with him working, he thinks that my friend & I are lazy cos we dont have jobs. He gets upset when he comes home cos the kids make a mess & to him it looks like we have done nothing all day.

So he takes most of my money for rent & board, thinking that if I have little money left I’ll get tired of it & get a job. Mind you, I dont even have a proper room & I dont use much electricity & I dont watch foxtel. I also dont eat that much.  They are always going out & drinking or buying shit they dont need, like dvds & figurines,  things i used to do & buy, & they show it off to m3 then complain about having no money!

And there’s shit happening in this house that I swear im the cause, cos technology hates me.

I get treated like one of the kids when its dinner time, but every other time when I try to talk or join an activity, I get ignored. And because my ‘room’ is downstairs where the xbox & computers are the kids are always down there yelling & screaming like kids do.  I get the feeling that I’m just a piece of furniture that they feel obligated to keep, though they’d rather throw it away.

Thats fine, I’m outa here in January.  That should give me enough time to complete my list of things to do. If I survive fucking Christmas! !!

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7 comments

distant.road 9/24/2014 - 12:06 am

I’ve been homeless… lived in shelters, my car, etc. It isn’t fun. There can, however, be life after homelessness. In your case, there can be life after the garage. It just takes time. You’ve given yourself some time… three months or so. So maybe you can try to determine what you can do to move forward from this situation.

Do the buses there have holders for bicycles? Here, we can put our bicycle on an external rack. It might be easier making that 2km to the bus stop if you bought a cheap bicycle. Even if the buses don’t have bike racks, maybe a bike would help you get around a little better? If there are places to work nearby, maybe it could work?

I’ve stayed in some really awful places… but it was a roof over the head and it was something. But I did the best I could to figure out how to move forward. I know you can do it. You come across as articulate and intelligent. Perhaps you shouldn’t give up?

kateralia 9/24/2014 - 12:29 am

My life has gone downhill rapidly over the past 2 years. I pretty much gave everything I had, monetary, physically & emotionally to my previous girlfriend & now I have lost everything.
I cant even used a bicycle, I wish I could, but the left side of my body is in constant pain & giving up on me.

Anunnaki 9/24/2014 - 12:15 am

You’re obviously Australian, do you need help with a living arrangement? What state/city are you in?

kateralia 9/24/2014 - 12:40 am

Im in brisbane, qld. I’m just a burden on anyone I live with cos I don’t/can’t function as a ‘normal’ person.

Anunnaki 9/24/2014 - 6:14 am

You’re not a burden, if that’s how other people feel about you that is a reflection of them and not you. That doesn’t make you the burden, it really makes them the burden. There is no functioning as a normal person, normal doesn’t exist. You just exist as yourself, like I exist as myself. You’re in a difficult living arrangement but that is not because of how you function. You’re special because you exist, as the universe experiencing itself as a human.

Dolunay 9/24/2014 - 1:45 am

Oh .. i’m sorry to see u’ve reached to this point, & sorry for losing your dad. but i still hope u’d change your mind till January.
do u have any job?
send me an email if u like, i’ll reply gladly. 🙂

kateralia 9/24/2014 - 4:17 am

???

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