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Psycho Testing

by depressednihilist95

Has anyone here had to do some “psychological testing?” What is it like? I’ve been told I’m going to be evaluated from these tests. I’ve taken some multiple choice tests before, but I’m wondering if there will be more to this. Will it hurt? Will they probe my anus? Any shared experiences would be nice…


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5 seconds of stendarr 9/10/2014 - 2:21 pm

anus probing is only performed during homosexual evaluations by professional homosexuals

BuscettiByGianna 9/10/2014 - 2:23 pm

They’re more then likely gonna ask a shitload of questions that make you want to rip your hair out. But that’s just from my experience.

depressednihilist95 9/10/2014 - 2:27 pm

So I guess it’ll hurt.

5 seconds of stendarr 9/10/2014 - 2:23 pm

I’ve gotten a bunch of psychological tests before, mostly to determine if I needed “emergency psychiatric hospitalization” ha. They just ask you a bunch of questions like “do you want to kill yourself?” “do you think of hurting yourself often?” etc. It’s not physical at all really from my experience.

depressednihilist95 9/10/2014 - 2:26 pm

Oh, great, THOSE questions. I guess it’s better than being probed.

The Mad Hatter 9/10/2014 - 6:26 pm

For the record, there are far worse things than getting probed lol

5 seconds of stendarr 9/10/2014 - 2:26 pm

if you answer any questions honestly they’ll either shove pills down your throat or throw you in a hospital

The Mad Hatter 9/10/2014 - 6:24 pm

Not all the time – last time I was evaluated they just sorted out a home treatment team to see me at home twice a day, make sure I was taking my medication and monitor me etc. But I wasnt suicidal, I was just on a crazy manic one seeing things, hearing voices, hadnt slept in over a week etc..

5 seconds of stendarr 9/10/2014 - 2:30 pm

not to deter anyone from doing that, just from my experience. I take 7 pills a day and have been hospitalized before and none of that has helped and the latter exacerbated my mental state actually. Maybe pills or hospitalization could help you, I suppose it’s worth a try if you really want to get better

C4 9/10/2014 - 2:54 pm

I would skip the psychological testing and try to get abducted by aliens instead. With them the anal probe is a virtual certainty, plus they won’t charge you for their services. A free anal probe!
Also: Getting probed by aliens doesn’t make you gay.

The Mad Hatter 9/10/2014 - 6:34 pm

Nothing makes you gay. But if you get probed by aliens and enjoy it – its probably a good indicator..

PeelASquid 9/10/2014 - 6:05 pm

They will lay you face down and naked on a metal tray and probe your ass with a extra long stalk of celery.

All of course while they wear surgical masks and laugh like hell.


5 seconds of stendarr 9/10/2014 - 7:42 pm


PeelASquid 9/10/2014 - 8:43 pm

a dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste 😉 lol

C4 9/10/2014 - 6:47 pm

@The Mad Hatter: “You said you were gonna probe me with your finger. HEY! That’s not your finger”!!
“I turn my back for a second and you wanna stick THAT in THERE”?!!?

Those Aliens are freaky.

The Mad Hatter 9/10/2014 - 7:17 pm

Hey, no-one said which finger, you forgot about the 11th finger there dude! And if you’re going to drop your guard and turn your back I cant be held responsible for what happens next.. 😛

C4 9/10/2014 - 7:36 pm

OMG! Aliens have an 11th finger?!
And it’s not even on their hand?!
Whoah. I just wanted a satellite dish inserted into me after the probe.

The Mad Hatter 9/10/2014 - 7:45 pm

Yeah dude, you gotta watch out for that 11th finger you never know where its been.. and their satellite dish is overrated, there’s only one channel and the reception is awful :/

C4 9/10/2014 - 7:50 pm

I might have to rethink this whole “getting probed” thing.
If I can’t get get free, quality satellite TV out of getting ass raped then why bother?

The Mad Hatter 9/10/2014 - 7:57 pm

Man, I lie awake worrying about that question most nights.
If the satellite and probing hadn’t been free I’d demand my money back..

C4 9/10/2014 - 8:11 pm

No shit, huh?
Just kiss me before you fuck me. I don’t care if you just ate a chili cheese dog and you’re missing three teeth. I’d still appreciate the kiss.
Afterwards we can discuss the satellite plan you signed on for. Tell me we’re getting the Chargers games. If not, it’s over skank.

The Mad Hatter 9/10/2014 - 8:20 pm

Well youre welcome to the kiss, as long as it’ll make the whole alien penetration affair a little bit more bearable for you. And if you think your getting any games at all, tough shit sherlock, all you get is QVC 24/7. And there’s no complaints or customer service – just additional probing. Every night for the rest of your life.

C4 9/10/2014 - 8:38 pm

QVC for life? That’s harsh. That’s worse than hell. The Weather Channel I can tolerate for eternity but QVC?
Further proof that there is no just, merciful God. Put me out of misery now. I thought I knew what suffering was, but QVC 24/7?
Are you Satan?

The Mad Hatter 9/10/2014 - 8:49 pm

Thats it dude, QVC for life. And if you go to a doctor and say “Please help me, Aliens come into my room every night and probe my ass, they’ve stuck a satellite up there that beams TV straight into my brain and it only plays QVC all day every day and I CANT TURN IT OFF!!?!!” then there’s no way in hell they’ll take you seriously, they’ll just give you antipsychotics which wont work because what you’re experiencing is 100% real, and lock you in a secure ward. With even less to distract you from your QVC. And you’ll still get probed every night, because aliens don’t give a shit about walls. Or you. That’s how fucked you’ll be.
And I’m not Satan. I’m so much worse. When Satan is having one of those bad writer’s block kinda days he comes to me for inspiration. And he never leaves wanting. Matter of fact, sometimes he leaves my company feeling violently sick. That’s how twisted I am.

C4 9/10/2014 - 9:03 pm

Word on the street is that Satan’s really good at domino’s and chess. He fries a wicked quesadilla too. I got no problem with the man downstairs _ except for this QVC thing.
Man. That’s just wrong. Any one of “the real housewives” selling me scented candles seems slightly less terrible. (Not by much).

The Mad Hatter 9/10/2014 - 9:32 pm

Thats what I mean though, the Dark Lord is all good and well and he plays a killer game of chess, kicks out some banging tex-mex and his chilli is out of this world (and underworld) but when it comes to seriously cruel and unusual tailored punishment he has to come to yours truly. For instance, if if was you, it wouldnt just be QVC. It would be a Chargers game you havent seen before, then as soon as it got to a good bit, it would be interrupted by a documentary on the history of the QVC channel until the game settled down. And I wouldn’t let you see the score. And as soon as it got near the ending, it would just be interrupted by the same documentary on repeat for the rest of the day. then the next day you’d see the same fragments of the same game, with more of the same documentary. for the rest of time – id never let you see the ending or any good bits. That’s how much of a terrible person I am. I’m so nasty I can’t help being disgusted at myself every time I see my own reflection.

The Mad Hatter 9/10/2014 - 9:39 pm

Oh – and I’d surround you with nachos and frosty cold beers day and night. But every time you reached for a brew, it would turn so hot and nasty it would practically be boiling in the can. And when you grabbed a nacho and brought it to your mouth, it would turn to undercooked green beans.

lonelyplatypus 9/10/2014 - 10:17 pm

It is possible that they give you either the Rorschach Test or the MMPI…

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