I posted yesterday.
This morning I woke up and thought “If I’m going to kill myself, today is the day.” And I’m too cowardly to go through with it. I’m giving myself just a few more days to pull out of this mess. I want kids, I want to get married and I want to graduate college. I’m a freshman this year. I have plans and ambitions. But I don’t want to live with this pain. Taking 3 pills for my depression is what I was told to do, and with that, I sleep through my classes.
If I take only 2? I want to die
Someone tell me I’m not weird. Someone tell me I’m not alone. I’m highly an introvert. I have groups that I go to but I don’t really have any friends. You may say that is not enough of a reason to take my own life. But I don’t have people that I hang out with who would miss me if I’m gone. I’m just another face at this college.
Tell me why I can’t live with myself and wish I was someone else. Is it okay to not have friends?
Please tell me it’s okay.
Please.
5 comments
Because you don’t have someone who wants to make you happy every day.
I understand, i feel the same, all i want is to be trully loved by someone i can love too, but that is but a dream to me.
It’s completely alright to not have any friends. I find my self alone in this world every time and when I did have friends, all betrayed me. Just understand you need your self most in life and that only you can truly love your self. Don’t give up on becoming a parent, a companion, a student and eventually an employed working class citizen.
Its ok. And you are not weird. 🙂
Maybe talk to Dr about changing meds? Or asking if you can try 2 and half pills, not 3.
Hugs. Hang in there. You can pull through this.
Yes – no, shit – its OK.
You can take THIS moment in time and decide that, before you end this game, you will give into life and discover what is possible before you make the decision to DISCARD what is possible.
There is no requirement that you be miserable 24/7 to justify your suicidal feelings. I promise.
(((HUGS)))
It’s okay.
Friends are nice, but in reality one day we’ll be alone with ourselves, and we’re going to be damn happy about it.
Stay alive,
XOXO
G