The white dress

When you dream of you cutting your arms and their never going to stop bleeding and then you step into that bath filled with cold water wearing that white dress and dreaming that you will never belong in this world but in the end why is there so many people that care? Why is it that people feel the need to be there for you when you know your not worth it? Why is it that you feel like you can never let your self live a bit? Why is it that you want to let someone know your deepest secrets but your scared they will turn away from you and never come back that they will never look at you the same way as before? Is it just to hard to feel that love that people want you to feel that they are always going to be there but to you, you know they will just go in the end.