I Can’t Stand my Family

I’m just done. I really don’t know how to cope with anything anymore. My mom has been in a bad mood for the past week, because she is very stressed about christmas shopping. And of course whenever she’s angry, who does she take her anger out on? Her family. So her and my older brother were fighting about were the clicker was, and my mom got really angry. She was calling him a bastard, lazy ass etc. And my brother just said “Can you stop being a dick to me”, which he should never had said. She starts saying how terrible we all are then she attacks me and says how I’m such a *****. I was very angry, so i just said “I’m sick of this shit”. Then she starts bawling. And whenever she cries everyone comforts her and hugs her. When I cry I get called a drama queen and a ***** and everyone looks down on me. She is bawling about how she is so stressed and she doesn’t deserve to be treated like this. But that’s how i feel when she taunts me and calls me names. Now she said she is bringing back all my christmas presents and that I’m nothing but a loudmouth *****. So now my phone is gone forever so now I can’t talk to anybody about this. I knew this would happen, it happens every single holiday. I can’t fucking stand being treated like this anymore. And I know once my dad gets home he’s going to attack me as well. They don’t even care anymore. They have still neglected my medical needs for months now. I still need a physical, a gastroenterologist, an MRI, an MRA, and a therapist. They don’t have enough money for a physical but they have enough money to buy a shitload of alcohol. I just need someone to listen to me, because no one else will. And I hate it when people tell me to get help not attention. I don’t want attention I want somebody to help me, because my parents refuse to help me, I don’t have a phone to talk to anyone, and my parents refuse to get me a therapist. They tell me I’m just wasting their money. I’m all alone. I have nobody. I’m still being bullied. I really do feel like dying, and the worst part is, nobody cares.