Can I really do this

Can I do this? Can I keep on pretending that everything is alright when it’s not? Life is to hard to even carry on and yes I am a teenager but not with a young mind I know life is hard I know there will be struggles but when you have no-one beside you to help you through those struggles it gets tough and horrible like you can’t do anything good like your always in the wrong. Which possibly could be true that I can’t do anything right however if their not related to me why should they have the power of judging me by my cover and not allowing me the chance to explain myself. Everyday i go home and i have to deal with the shit that goes with going home which isn’t nice it means i have to put up with them calling me a druggie which being a person who self-harms isn’t the best feeling knowing that people think that you are like that even when you know yourself that it isn’t true however other people’s opinion means a lot to you when you live yin there house. Yet they know I wouldn’t do that kind of thing as i know they have young children but it still hurts and it’s not like I am able to move back into living with my mother because she mentally can’t look after me and I wouldn’t be able to allow myself to put that much stress on her by looking after me which is unfair. So please anybody with helpful comments please comment on here for me please it would help me out a lot