I miss her so much it hurts. She was my everything. My reason to get up in the morning. My reason to want to be a better person. My reason to want to live.
Now that she has left me, there is a hole inside me. The hole is so big, I can’t function anymore. I can’t work. I can’t think straight. I can’t laugh or smile. I’m useless without her.
All I do every second of every day is think about her. I have daydreams of her texting me or calling me to say she still loves me and she made a mistake. I imagine our reunion and it is glorious and amazing.
If only I could see her smile at me once more. She has the most beautiful smile I have ever seen. If only I could touch her face, stroke her hair, kiss her lips.
But I know she is gone and never coming back to me. She is happy in her new life without me. Even though it is the same as the old life she left to be with me in the first place. That life she hated so much, that life that made her feel like a zombie. That life that made her heart feel like it was disappearing.
She said I came along and it was like she was waking up from a coma. She could feel things once again. Her heart knew true love for the first time. She said I was like a gift from God.
Now I’m nothing to her at all. After 5 1/2 years of complete devotion, she has abandoned and erased me. She has taken away my reason to live. And yet, I still love her with all my heart and soul. And I always will.
Oh how I miss you my beautiful girl.