I don’t need a reason to kill myself. I need a reason not to kill myself. I have self harmed and suffered from severe depression for around 4 months now, and this was diagnosed 2 months ago. I hate everything and everyone and every day is a depressed numb hellhole. I have no hope for the future and no motivation to do anything anymore. I am failing in school as a result and this makes me even sadder. I am losing friends and all hope. Last month I came very close to committing suicide with a train and if I had alcohol I surely would have, but I tried to do it sober and pussied out, but I came so very close. Now suicidal thoughts have returned and it has never been this dark and painful. Every breath feels like a waste and nothing will ever improve I hate counsellors etc. Please help me are there any (non-cliche) REAL reasons for me to not take my own life? It seems so easy and there would be no more struggle like sleeping for ever ( I love sleep <3) seems like such a good option. Only thing stopping me right now is the hurt my parents would feel when they got the news of my death. Apart from them no one would even care for more than a day or so. Sorry its long any feedback would be greatly appreciated. Thanks :'(
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3 comments
do you know why you started to get depressed? it’s not common for severe depression to appear arbitrarily, there must some key variables that created it.
there are so many good things to experience in life like nature and travelling 🙂 you should try travelling if that is possible to get some new scenery and to show you that there is more to life than outside our immediate troubles
when I was very depressed I took a trip to Acadia national park in Maine and it was incredibly therapeutic. I climbed mountains and from the top you could see the wide expanse of trees and shelves of rock and beautiful sapphire water where tiny sailboats were sailing. it was so big, I couldn’t even comprehend how small i was in that moment in contrast to the prodigious landscape and nature. I still remember the sound of seagulls as they circled the bay and the smell of crisp water. you should try going to a national park 🙂
A train is a pretty brual way to do it.
Non cliche real reasons..
Even though sleep forever sounds pretty nice at first, it also means you won’t be able to do pretty much anything else you like anymore. Or well anything at all.
Things always have a chance to improve later, if you end up doing that you lose that chance.