Pain is thay friend you keep close as you cut. It’s what’s needed to survive the depression. Pain grows and is fed through self hate. Self hate can be acquired through any means, although some self hate is stroger than others’ self hate. The difference between me and you is that when you wake up, your nightmare ends. I used to live in fear of death. But i turned that fear into self hate to feed the mature pain that has been accumulated inside of me since i was born. That pain gave birth to a hate of life and everything that falls within that category of LIFE. I became a being of darkness to ensure that my pain is never healed and that my hate grows as well.