I’m alone all the time. Other people my age go out and have fun…I don’t have hardly any memories I can recall. I didn’t even do anything on my 21st birthday…was alone and depressed. Wouldn’t anyone think I was the most uninteresting, worthless person in the world if they knew I spend all my nights sitting alone on my bed at night, crying most of the time saturated in misery? Aren’t I wasting this precious life and youth I’ve been given? I would have friends and fun but I can’t. I don’t connect with anyone. I lost the guy I was in love with because I was a bummer and he doesn’t give a shit anyway just wanted the sex. I’m afraid of everyone and everything and I just want to hide because I can’t connect with them. I never have anything to say nor do I want to talk. I can’t take this guilt and hatred for myself any more, it’s eating me up. I want to feel okay.