I would trade no ones shoes to swap suicidal scenarios. I can imagine they are all just as bad as each other. Mental pain, physical pain, no matter what it is. Torment and pain beyond what most of us are capable of handling. How did i get to this place and scenario. Anyone ever youtubed what its like being a schizophrenic.. Its fun for the first ten seconds or when youre on a high then its depressing, scary, obtrusive, crazy and intruding.
Im schizophrenic almost every second of the day and meds do jack shit unless you want to be zombified do you.. No.
Ive heard shit that would fuck with you badly. Worst shit that anyone could hear and im still here telling a story of voices and mental deprivation. No one can say i can help you because they cant. Pointless and stupid. I try to blank out the voices even though theyre there. These voices respond and interact and fuck with me. Help me. But how. Dose me up on drugs and be a zombie and gain mass weight. Or how about suicide. Yeah suicide sounds good doesnt it wouldnt have to deal with voices of your just paranoid, sucks to be you in two years. Not that bad is it over and over again. Immobilizing voices. Now suicide doesnt sound so bad does it. Trying to live in a normal world without being acting or saying anything abnormal. Just a tad ecentric thinking you can fix everything but cant even fix the voices in your head. Crazy shit out there.
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Have you ever considered HORMONAL THERAPY? My grandma is schizophrenic and when she was put on hormones in ’90s she had 8 years of remission (!). It was a young doctor who put her on hormones because the other ones didn’t want to believe that it could help. It did help. I don’t know how it is in your country, maybe you could try it? I experienced derealization and depersonalization that felt like being possessed by someone (a bit like schizophrenia, maybe, but I didn’t hear voices) and to this moment I can’t understand how people may do drugs and want to feel “unrealistic”. It’s the worst feeling ever! I wouldn’t want the greatest enemy to feel like that.
Dude, what meds are you on. If your meds arn’t working for you maybe you should be on a higher dose or have your psych switch meds. The new generation meds arn’t that bad now. I’ve taken 3 types of different anti-psychotics and although some of them have made me sleep a lot, none of them have made me feel ‘zombified’. Tranquillisers they are a different story.