I am a miserable person, I hate my life. I know nothing will ever be perfect for me. Pointless. I am nothing more than a catfish, ugly on the outside and ugly on the inside.
I can’t go anywhere, I can’t see anyone, I can’t do anything. I am so tired of being so despised.
Sometimes I think I can do this, I can live like a normal person, but I can’t.
Happiness is so fleeting.
I long for that little rush of adrenaline that comes from someone loving you, but when they find out who I am they always leave me. Even if I tell you too much about me, or you get to know me too well, I promise you will end up disliking me.
I am awful, I find joy in the worst things. I am so terrible. I can’t live like this anymore, I hate my body and I hate my personality. I pray that when I die, I will become a new person. Someone who loves their life. Who finds love.
That’s what I want so badly. To be loved. Unfortunately, I know that it is impossible for anyone to love me as the human being I am right now. I am unlikable and a bad person, and a liar. It’s impossible.
Anyways, I used to plan to end my life on my 29th birthday. I am impatient, I don’t know when to do it.
I thank you for reading this, it is kind of you to have finished my post when I sound so boring and miserable. Ha. Anyways. ????? (for now.)