It’s the second time I write here today. I really thought things would take a turn for the better but It wasn’t the case. It makes some pretty good time since I got this bad. I just wanna cry but I simply can’t, maybe it’s because I don’the have the option to fail this time. Like my life would crumble if I did that, there was also one other thing that bothers me. My family have seen the pages I’ve been accessing and then they found out about suicideproject.org. No need to say they are very worried about me but even so they don’t understand me and only end up making things worse, now I don’t even wanna be at home. I don’t want to keep faking out so many things, feelings, expressions, emotions. I just wanna find a place in which I can talk about all these things. It’seems good to hear people with similar stories but I don’the want to keep feeling like that, at the same time I don’t want to lock everything inside me one more time, how could I live like that? I’m terribly lost now and will have classes tomorrow, will have to go no matter what, sure it’s gonna be tough but I will have to do it. Wish me luck. Hope someone have been reading all these things…
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Hey, if you want to chat, I’ve made a group for socially anxious and depressed people to talk in private: https://groups.google.com/forum/#!forum/far-from-the-world
Have you heard about “subconsciously deliberate mistake” ?
In French, we call them “missed acts”. An example: you want to kill yourself, but you make a mistake, and by this mistake, other people could prevent you to kill yourself. Do you undestand what I mean?
So, you made this mistake, and now they know, and now you are very very ashamed. It’s normal. And you will be better only after a while. But It’s a very good thing they reacted like that, they reacted in a clumbsy way (it’s very hard to know exactly how to behave in such situations), but they proved they do care.
Let several days to pass. They are as embarassed than you, and it won’t help communication, they could act in a way even more clumbsy now, but at least, you know they do care, and they know you have problems.
I’ve posted a link toward a google group I’ve created to chat with you, but it won’t pass the moderation it seems.
Yeah… I have to let it through. Will have to figure out how because… It’seems been only 3 days since I created my account.
Found out how!