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I Give Up

by Teresa's Child

I’m broken. All this time I’ve fought, hoping somewhere deep in my heart that I would get a happily ever after. That somehow, if I did my best and achieved all my ideals, I would end up understood, loved, and strong.

No longer. It is time for me to accept reality. No matter what I do, my life will end wretchedly, alone, unloved. Never the hero, always the villain. Fine. But then I don’t care. I no longer care about anything. Live, die, break, form, none of that matters anymore.

I finally accept this reality. I am alone. There is no meaning to my life. My false ideals will drag me down into hell, and yet there is no way for me to change. Fine. I no longer have anything to lose, and I no longer have anything to gain. Diem is once again a deadman. And this time, he will stay that way.

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4 comments

Trix 10/30/2015 - 6:08 pm

Don’t tell yourself you’ll stay that way. You write beautiful posts. It’s clear that you still love someone very deeply. We always feel more alone when we love someone who we have to keep a distance from. You won’t be alone forever.

rocketman 10/30/2015 - 7:25 pm

Diem S. Sky,

when you got nothing you got nothing to lose you can only go up! you want to be a hero then be heroic, heroes don’t give up. so put on your little cape and show the world i’m Diem S. Sky hero at large!!!

Sammi6xoxo 10/30/2015 - 8:00 pm

Diem. You’re one of my heroes. Never a villain. Always something to offer. I hate that you’ve reached this point. I wish there was something I could do. If you think of anything, name it.

Tristeza 10/30/2015 - 8:53 pm

I can’t see you as a villain either, Diem. I don’t know what tomorrow will bring for you, but hopefully company and love; the things that someone like you deserves.

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