I’ve come to the same conclusion as I did probably a good 15+ years ago. The guy I had loved so deeply is completely unobtainable. ALL MEN over 6ft tall and over 200 lbs are absolutely untouchable, unreachable and unobtainable. They all will only be with the skinniest, smallest, tiniest, anorexic looking women. He’s no exception. No one will ever love him like I could. To him, looks are what defines love. It’s love if he can get into her looks. I care, and hate to leave him on his own with what he faces in life, but he leaves me no choice. I’m too fat and ugly to ever have a man at all and I certainly can’t get a big & tall man because they are ALL shallow assholes who feel they have to prove themselves to the world and show that they’re not too fat to get an anorexic trophy wife. I’m going to kill myself someday, I just don’t know when. I can’t be happy without love. And I’m only attracted to the big men I can’t get. And I only fall for the one sign that will NEVER be with anyone of my sign. I can’t live very long with the pain onside and the mental torture of knowing I’m not good enough to be loved, that I failed in life, couldn’t get a man and never had it with a Scorpio when my bat shit crazy, anti-sex mom has been married to two of them. I’m obviously so worthless that my love and loyalty means nothing.
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Hi. It seems like there’s some two-way challenges with appearances going on. You’ve narrowed down the people you would date to a certain image. At the same time, the people you’re seeking have also narrowed down who they would date to a certain image. Nobody comes out ahead.
You weren’t very complimentary to yourself. I doubt that you’re ugly. Perhaps meet someone who falls a bit outside the ‘ideal image’ that you’re seeking? It’s nice to have expectations but maybe loosening up the qualifications could help. You might meet someone who you’re highly compatible with that you hadn’t previously considered.
As for looks in general, it’s not your problem if somebody doesn’t like the way you look. If somebody’s ego doesn’t allow them to date you, then you’re better off without them. It’s better to learn about egos early in the game than later when your heart has already fallen for them. I’m sure there is someone out there for you. Sometimes you meet them when you aren’t expecting to meet anyone.
Words like “all”, “too”, “never” will only make you convinced that this is the way things are and you’ll never be able to change it. But you will, over time.
I noticed you said those guys are shallow, but you go for a type of guy who tends to have a different type to you. Maybe you should try to give other types of people a chance. But if one day you can put the guy you like aside, things might start to seem less hopeless.
You already know somebody else likes you, so you have proof (whatever you say about it) that you’re not “too far and ugly to ever have a man at all”. So maybe you can get the kind of man you’re generally attracted to as well. This particular man, though, I would leave behind… however much it hurts. Liking him and not being able to reach him is changing the way you see the world, and as long as you’re physically around him it’ll be that much harder to leave him behind in your mind.
I think a fat guy should accept a fat girl. Sorry it goes both ways. Why do fat men get to be shallow but fat female-born people don’t get to prefer fat men???
I know it goes both ways. That’s my point – maybe you’re looking at the same kinds of men and they’re often unobtainable. I don’t mean necessarily because of their looks or your looks or anyone’s type. Just that you could try looking elsewhere. Especially with this one guy – it’s clear that he is shallow and that finding a person with a certain look is important to him. There’s no right or wrong. But he’s missing out on you because he’s looking for a different type of person as far as looks go, and you might be missing out on something great because you’re focused on him.
I think that you’re just looking in all of the wrong places. You’re looking for people based more on looks than on who they are on the inside. Also, when you shoot for these “unattainable” people you’re doing something similar to what they’re doing. Refusing to look below what you view as what is attractive. In this case I think you need to re evaluate just as much he does.
Again, fat guys should accept fat girls.
I’m not saying either of you are correct. You might want to focus more on finding a person that cares about you for who you are on the inside. Both sides of these are not necessarily correct. He has a right to what he finds attractive and you have the same right. It is completely plausible for you to find a person that finds you attractive for your body type and mindset that you also find attractive for the same reasons.
Im a fat guy i love fat girls they dont love me. Lol
Oh Disguise, you make me tired..
If he thinks looks are what defines love, then you don’t really need it. He has some very shallow characteristics that are doing him absolutely no good. Also, this fixation you have on super skinny death-looking women being the only ones able to recieve love isn’t helpful, healthy, or true.
Not all big and tall men are shallow, I think wanting a guy based on criteria of appearance is a bit reckless, ya people have a type but it means nothing if there isn’t a good person inside. Those generalizations help no one.
You already know that other guy has shown interest in you, even if that’s not a real possibility of happening the fact remains that someone has shown interest in you despite this image you hold of yourself, which should be a sign to you that hey, maybe you’re not disgusting after all, and if it’s possible for someone to show interest in you, then it’s possible for them to love you too.
I also think you are putting a bit too much importance on astrological signs…
A man the falls for beauty only? Even for the beautiful it is empty. And saying this runs the risk of minimalizing your very real heart felt post. I often think beauty is wasted on the beautiful.
I understand having a flavor of man you are attracted to. For years I had one type only that did it for me. I found that they were all unobtainable. One day I took a chance and went after someone that was totally different. The outer shell, this thing we see with our eyes that does it for us, it is something learned. We learn it young and it is possible to make your mind change what attracts you. Nope it isn’t easy but it makes the heartache of constantly chasing after what i can’t possible have less.
disgusting,
I felt that way but in reverse I’m not over 6 feet tall so i found a midget girlfreind and i was just nuts over her!! 🙂 honestly myself i never thought about the size of a person or color or anything else, just whats inside.
*sniff sniff* I smell the air of superiority, he probably thinks he is a heartbreaker.