There are certain triggers that will cause an overwhelming feeling of sadness. It doesn’t last very long but I feel it, I remember it. I have a relative who is sick and dying and I don’t have my life together so I can take care of them. I get so damn angry at myself I should have been done with college and had a good job by now. I’m going to school entering my senior year next semester working 2 jobs trying to stay a float with my tuition. I think I’m going to get a loan next semester and focus on taking my relative on vacation trips because enjoying that with them doesn’t have a price. So what if I’ll have some ridiculous loan to pay off later the important thing is that I did something for a person I love. My choice is, pay for school or pay for my loved one to enjoy whats left of their live seems pretty simple to me right? I just wish that I could lavish them but I can only do so much and I hate that :(.
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Sorry that you are under so much pressure and feeling so sad. Don’t feel bad that school has taken longer for you than you had hoped. You are doing your best and it is so much more than many other people can manage. I’m sorry to hear about your relative. I wonder if they would want you to get in to debt though. I understand how you feel about spending quality time with them. I don’t think it can be at the cost of finishing school. I can’t imagine that they would want that for you. I dunno. I really feel for you because you are obviously a really kind and hard working person. I hope things get easier for you some how.
Alina, are you Romanian?